What is the best diet if you work in PR? Asks Hacked Off

I reckon I may have lost a few pounds. My post shower glance in the mirror this morning wasn’t quite as depressing as normal.
Was this the result of some crash diet? No. I suspect it's work related stress. Seems to work for me, but as I looked around the office I spotted a number of different diet/exercise categories? Which one do you belong to?

Exercise-a-lot and eat-a-lot:

The guy who has the best body in the office (according to my boss, I couldn‘t possibly comment) is a Triathlon nut. He says he has to consume a shed load of calories to manage his strenuous training schedule. The training takes up so much time, this diet can only work if you don’t have a family, or a life.

Traditional dieting:

There are quite a few fans of WeightWatchers in the office, some of whom it must be said, are clearly not sticking to the plan. This is a good diet for people who like to count, as there is a point system you have to follow apparently.

Starve-two-days-a-week diet:

This is so popular in PR-land that I have lost count of the number of people I know who claim they hardly eat for two days a week – never on the days I see them I notice.

Organic only:

Some say that the purer the food, the less fattening it is. Does that mean I can eat two big bars of chocolate if it’s organic?

The dieting-makes-you-fat non-diet:

There are some skinny people I speak to who say that diets make people fat. But I also notice that these people never seem to eat anything anyway, which in my view is a permanent diet.

Fags and unhealthy living:

Yep, that’s the one that’s working for me.